| learning. |


cotton candy eyesdreaming of draping delerium over your drowsy eyes dreaming of drowning delilahs in delusion and dyes dreaming of dressing the damages in your darkened skies dreaming of nothing, and nowhere, and no one at night.cotton candy eyes
-
a story in reverse: darkness. and then, light.
your rocking chair, my wrinkled hands. your veins, my glasses. our children's children, knitted booties, glasses turning to plastic cups, daily pills. ours growing up- jazz on sunday mornings. dance lessons, coffee, books in bed and mother's day.
ballet class, football games, have a good day at work, muesli, m


compliations of complicationsi'm tired, i'm tired, i'm tired- of being your unofficial girl.compliations of complications
how fucking fitting because somehow i let myself slip into delusion that you might actually like me for the freckles on the backs of my hands or how i think everything is in triangles or just for my smile.
you say you didn't want to but everyone knows you did because there she was, perched on your lap and you kissed her because i was gone for the night and you were left behind with your beer and your greengreen eyes.
well, i've had enough. just watch me give you chance number


fragments of youare any of you real or are you all just fragments of my imagination? your porcelain faces with glass lipsfragments of you
haunt my dreams and now i'm chasing nightmares down crowded streets; but i can't bear to lose them.
you all fill every corner of my menangerie, and the ring leader is losing control with his cracked whip and broken smile. he's writing letters and cramming them into jars so that when he throws them onto the concrete floor he can hear the destruction he so badly needs to cause.
and none of you can be real because you're all invisible but i can see you-


you were my storywrite him a storyyou were my story
write him a story write him a story about how you used to ride bareback with your hair down, about how you used to comb your hair on tuesdays, thursdays and sundays, about how you used to smile.
the words are lost somewhere in the conundrum which is my eyes- filled filled filled to the brim with worthless droplets of you.
always you.
-
here's your story: i used to ride bareback with bare feet and comb my hair not-everyday. i used to smile when i was happy. i used to write him songs on the backs of my hands just in case he ever wanted to look at th
[erehttonmiseratssselpeels]
sorry
p.s. today you reminded me of the color silver
--
cross my heart.
and lordy god is your writing beautiful.
--
our lives tick by like pendulum swings; delicate things, like butterfly wings.
--
cross my heart.
love sucks.
shit. just, shit.
--
cross my heart.
[my blurry head now comes with a multiple language option.]
--
cross my heart.
--
Remember Hannah. news article --> [link] TV program --> [link] Depression should never be fought alone.
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cross my heart.
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